Worf Ordered to Undergo Sensitivity Training by Star Fleet Human Resources!

Today is a good day to kiss my ass!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lieutenant Worf, son of Mogh, of the Starship Enterprise has been ordered to undergo several weeks of sensitivity training at Star Fleet Headquarters after a series of complaints against him.

“Star Fleet prides itself on being inclusive, tolerant and sensitive” said their Director of Human Resources.

And yes I know “Human” Resources is a non-inclusive term but we already have that stenciled in on the door to my office and it would cost too much to replace it. Anyway we pride ourselves on being inclusive and tolerant. Well except for the races we kill off when we accidentally destroy their sun. But that is a mistake anyone can make. Anyway as I was saying we are inclusive and tolerant. Well except for Latvians. They are banned from Star Fleet. But that’s just common sense. And as an inclusive and tolerant people Worf’s attitude was not part of our core values of inclusiveness and tolerance. Except for the Latvians. That’s why we ordered him to undergo sensitivity training.

Worf ran afoul of Star Fleet when word reached headquarters that he was attempting to use genuine Klingon mating rituals on board the Enterprise.

Star Fleet is very inclusive and doesn’t judge. Except for Latvians. And Belgians. Belgians! We despise them and their damn waffles! Anyway Worf was using authentic Klingon mating rituals on his shipmates.This involves a lot of sniffing of arm pits and licking. The male also reads Klingon love poetry while the female throws furniture at him. Hey, we at Star Fleet are very inclusive and non-judgmental but these mating rituals are just plain weird. It’s like Klingons are Swedish or something. And the poetry he was reading?  I can understand someone good like Rod McKuen  but Klingon poetry is well, very Klingon. Lots of sex and violence. Lots of heterosexual sex and violence. Look we at Star Fleet are very inclusive, tolerant and non-judgmental but all this heterosexual breeding sex talk could lead to law suits. We asked Worf if there was any homosexual Klingon poetry he could read.  That’s when he called me a QI’yaH. I have no idea what that means but it is probably insensitive. So we ordered him to come to headquarters for sensitivity training. Star Fleet prides itself on being sensitive. I mean it’s not like we are Mexican or anything.

Worf’s commander, Captain Picard agreed that Worf needed counseling.

The turbolift stopped once and the door opened and he and Counselor Troi were going at it like animals. Sweating and naked. Come on I don’t need to see that. I’m French!  I would have reprimanded him on the spot but I was late to a, um, counseling session with Doctor Crusher. Okay it was more like role play. I am the soccer player who has just been given a red card and she is the ref. I would do anything to get her take back the red card. See? Nothing unusual about that. Not like these Klingon sex rituals. I mean you’d think the Klingons were Argentinean or something.

Star Fleet is not optimistic that the sensitivity training will take with Worf.

“At his first class we asked him to talk about his feelings” said a counselor.

“He just stood up and said ‘Today is a good day to kiss my ass.’ Then he walked out. Such insensitivity!  You’d think he was Chinese!”

(59)

2 Responses

  1. LSP says:

    It’s about time that cisgender oppressor was held to account. Thank you, Infidel.

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