British Board of Tourism Unveils Catchy New Slogan!

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Are you in poor health? Let us kill you

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hoping to cash in on the publicity surrounding the death of the child Alfie Evans at a Liverpool Hospital, the British Board of Tourism unveiled a new ad campaign with the catchy slogan:  “Britain: Come for the tea. Stay and watch us kill your child.”

“Let’s face it. Tourism has been down for years” said an executive with the National Tourism Board.

I mean the weather sucks. It’s always cold and raining. It’s like being in Seattle but without all the Starbucks. The trains don’t run. London is a third world shithole on par with Detroit. And if you do visit you’re likely to be a victim of an acid attack from a Muslim.  Plus soccer?  Come on. We only pretend to like it. It’s a profoundly boring game. Is it any wonder no one wants to come here anymore. That’s why this whole refusing to treat your child in the hospital and letting him die is so exciting for us. It’s a hook. An angle to get the tourists.

After an informal poll of all Tourist Board employees (women, transgendered and peoples of color only), killing children was the clear winner, beating out other contending slogans such as “Britain: Like Ireland but without all the annoying Catholics”, “Britain: Not as warm and sunny as Spain but still better than France” and “Britain: Like the Netherlands but cleaner.”

You’d be surprised how many parents have contacted us asking if they could bring their children to Britain to be killed. We are fielding requests from all over the world. While at the moment we cannot guarantee that your child will die in one of our hospitals we have replied to everyone to get back to us the moment you suspect your child is ill. And no force-feeding your kid kale until he vomits does not count.

Indeed so-called “death tourism” is catching on. After Great Britain announced its slogan Guatemala unveiled their new “Die violently as part of a gang initiation” slogan.

“We can’t let the Anglos take the initiative. We are cold and heartless too!” said a Guatemalan official.

Not wishing to be outdone North Dakota launched its “Come die of boredom” ad campaign.

“We have a lot of Scandinavians here. They are so boring you will welcome death” said North Dakota’s governor.

Despite criticism in some quarters of their new slogan, Britain’s Board of Tourism intends to keep the slogan and maintains that they really didn’t have a choice.

“We used to get a lot of tourism for the Royal Family. But nowadays if people want to see ill-tempered, inbred and not-too-intelligent people they can just stay at home and watch Jersey Shore marathons on TV.”

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2 Responses

  1. LSP says:

    The left loves killing children. They’re possessed by Moloch.

    Imagine the demons coming for the medical health professionals who killed the child. Perhaps they’ll see them in the corners of their hospital rooms before they die, or maybe hear them.

    On the other hand, the murderers might repent.

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