We are for the American people. Americans. So ‘effing gullible.

Here at the Worldwide Headquarters of Manhattan Infidel™ our mission statement is:  The facts and just the facts.  (That replaces our old mission statement of “Come on honey, just touch it.“)

Document Number Two (Daily Message Guidance)

MESSAGE OF THE DAY: Hillary is running FOR president because she’s a woman and she’s entitled to be president. Come on people. Show her some love. She’s weak, helpless and oppressed. Hillary will continue to talk to voters about the bold policy agenda she’s put forward to solve problems that keep Americans up at night, just as she did this week in Appalachia when she told them she was closing down the coal factories. I’m sure that kept many an Appalachian resident up at night. More than any candidate on either side, Hillary has put forward a serious, substantive and comprehensive agenda to solve the problems that keep Americans up at night – like raising wages to 25 dollars an hour, making college more affordable by forcing those making over 150,000 per year to pay for everyone else, tackling health care costs even though most of the state-run exchanges have gone out of business,combating climate change by outlawing travel and keeping our country safe by outlawing guns for private citizens. 

EMAIL TALKING POINTS: Guccifer claims:

• As multiple news outlets have reported, the security logs from Secretary Clinton’s email server do not show any evidence of foreign hacking. The logs show only that a Russian named “Putin” hacked and read every email. We have no idea who this Putin is. Perhaps a teenager in a red state.
•  In addition to the fact he offers no proof to support his claims, his descriptions of Secretary Clinton’s server are inaccurate. The server was not housed in the bathroom. It was housed at a local International House of Pancakes. Also, the server was black not brown.
•  It is unfathomable that he would have gained access to her emails. Absolutely unfathomable.  Even though there was no password on the admin account the server was secure. No one at the International House of Pancakes had access to the server. Unless they ordered the Rooty Tooty Fresh and Fruity pancakes. Server access was part of the special.
• We have received no indication from any government agency to support these claims. And by government agency we mean not the FBI or CIA which did inform us. But we chose not to listen to to them. You could say we had no intent to listen to them so it wasn’t a crime..
• The bottom line is, while Hillary Clinton admits that her use of a personal email account was not the best choice, much like her marrying Bill or her affair with Joan Baez, or filming her sex acts with Joan Baez, there is no evidence of foreign hacking by Guccifer or anyone else, and by no evidence we mean as we’ve said time and again, nice house you got there. Shame if something were to happen to it. Moreover her private email server was allowed under the rules in place at the time and was consistent with the practice of prior Secretaries of State, including Colin Powell. You know Colin is black. That makes it okay.

Okay. I’m sold. Hillary for President.

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