Words mean things.

With the new year upon us many readers, confused by the events of the past four months, have asked me to come up with a handy race riot lexicon so that they can better understand what the media is reporting.  And so now, presented for your approval, is the Official Manhattan Infidel Race Riot Lexicon.™

Gentle Giant = Court records sealed

White cop = Hispanic cop

Mostly peaceful protests = Destruction not seen since the siege of Stalingrad

Legitimate historical grievances = Give me my free shit

Looting = Unsubstantiated reports probably started by teabaggers who hate black people

Unsubstantiated reports of looting = Destruction not seen since the siege of Leningrad

Appeals for calm  = The MSM is bored and wants a race war desperately to help their ever falling ratings

National discussion on race relations = Lecturing 

Local police are ineffective  = Local police are all dead

Federal intervention = Giving money to local authorities to line their pockets

Don’t shoot = I’ll shoot you first 

Racially divided = More lecturing

Unsubstantiated reports of sporadic violence = Reporter gets hit in head with rock

The GOP war on woman = Reporter raped while interviewing rioters

Unsubstantiated reports = Pretty much anything reported by cable news

Waiting for a statement from Al Sharpton = He is working behind the scenes to extract money from local authorities

Al Sharpton is flying to the scene and is expected shortly = Bitch better have my money

Al Sharpton has met with local authorities and will issue a statement before flying home  = Bitch got his money

A return to the days of Bull Connor = Local youth hit by rock while looting

President Obama will issue statement = As soon as he plays his 18 holes

MSNBC will provide live coverage soon =  Our reporter was hit in the head with a rock

The leader of the black race in America, Al Sharpton, was greeted enthusiastically by crowds  = Someone threw a rock at his head

Let’s shine the spotlight on race inequality in America = As long as it hurts the GOP

It is time to stop the wall-to-wall coverage and let the healing begin = Our wall-to-wall coverage was hurting the Democrats

Rape culture on campus = Shit our coverage of the rioting was really hurting the Democrats

Putin! = Fuck! The Democrats are losing in a landslide.  

I’m moving to Canada = The Republicans won!

And so readers, armed with this handy lexicon may you better understand what our news media are reporting.

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