Spam (The I Have an Alibi Edition)

Spam is the tie that binds

Spam is the tie that binds

It has been hectic this week at the Worldwide Headquarters of Manhattan Infidel™ between Christmas shopping and clearing my internet history so visitors do not see what I’ve been viewing.

So instead of actually preparing anything to write it’s time for the latest visit to the Spam factory. (Spam valid in continental United States only.  Allow three to six weeks for delivery of Spam.)

Pinlsteyro writes:

As many as four have died in two days.

My alibi is airtight.

The Slows writes:

I have been exposed to coaches.

They like to watch. That’s why I always waited until I got home to take my shower after practice.

Nicextito writes:

An epicurean is someone who likes only the finest food.

So we’re talking about pop tarts?  I don’t even bother putting them in the toaster but eat them right out of the box.

Timberland Shoes writes:

Only one person was killed in Oklahoma, but two in Kansas and one in Missouri.

I told you I have an alibi!

Sim Air Force writes:

Feel the interiors!

Relax.  I’m a blogger. You can trust me.

Timberland Online writes:

The cost was staggering.

Well you asked for a reach around.  I told you that’d be extra.

Hogrefe writes:

Training for obedience is a continuous process.

You’re married, aren’t you, sir?

Slidersrillbar writes:

Insert it now!

Slow down, will you.  A boy likes to be sweet talked.

Aporeef Club writes:

Freed 25 kidnapped children.

How many times do I have to tell you people I have an alibi!

Reinsaxsm writes:

Will be round, or oval in shape, white, yellow or grey in color and  inflamed around the edge.

If you can’t trust a twenty dollar hooker when she says she’s clean then what is this world coming to?

Bletiker writes:

The ancient Chinese philosophy was that heaven was a circle.

So that’s the ancient Chinese secret?  But I thought heaven was a parabola?

Guiseppe Zanotti writes:

Laugh at the bag!

Is that nice?  I have a hernia.

Zapaosmbt Madrid writes:

Usually, soap and washcloths are not available.

So?  We’ll lick each other clean.

Orchard Golf Course writes:

Do you ever run into any problems with plagiarism?

What can I say?  It was the best of times.  It was the worst of times.

Boksmia writes:

When love is no longer with us we can’t go on.

That’s why I keep her in my crawlspace.  She’ll always be with me.

Parkin Org writes:

The bags must have fallen.

Stop looking at my hernia!

Rvxanthus writes:

The Algarve region is divided into 16 municipalities.

F*ck you.

LV Neverful MM Size writes:

Does operating a well-established website like yours require a massive amount of work?

Does it ever!  I’m so busy now I’ve had to cut back my self-pleasuring activities to 21 times a week.

And finally, Lindsono writes:

Yesterday while I was at work my iPad was stolen.

Usually I’d say I have an alibi but since this is not a capital offense I’m gonna fess up. Yeah, that was me.

And that’s it dear readers.  Spam!  It does a heart good.


2 Responses

  1. I never knew Spam could be so erotic. The stores here don’t carry Spam (or much of anything else these days). I wonder if Amazon or E-Bay have Spam for sale?

Leave a Reply

Using Gravatars in the comments - get your own and be recognized!

XHTML: These are some of the tags you can use: <a href=""> <b> <blockquote> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>