Al Gore Sells Brooklyn Bridge!

The Brooklyn Bridge, formerly owned by Al GoreDespite howling winds, snow drifts of 10 to 15 feet and bitter cold, former Vice President Al Gore sold the Brooklyn Bridge today to a group of tourists from Slovakia.

At noon, Gore approached a group of tourists taking photos and asked them if they would like to “buy the bridge.”  Naturally the tourists were delighted.

“This is a generous country.  We came here to see famous bridge and we go home owning it” said the spokesman for the group.

Gore explained that part of the proceeds from the sale will be go towards his new global warming foundation.

Look at the conditions in New York City today.  People are freezing, trying to dig out from under record snowfall.  Howling winds make it dangerous for small children to venture outside for fear they will be swept away into the vortex. All these cold temperatures are the result of catastrophic and unsustainable global warming.  The Earth’s core temperature has heated up so much it’s causing temperatures to decrease.

Despite concerns over the legality of the sale (Gore was not able to provide a deed proving his ownership of the landmark) Gore defiantly pocketed the $250 deposit the Slovakians gave him.

Why would anyone doubt I own this bridge? Let’s focus on the big issues here: 1. Rapid global warming is causing bitter cold throughout the U.S.  2.  I have a bridge to sell you.

Immediately after this pronouncement Gore noticed several NYPD officers approaching him and said, “Crap, the cops.  How did they know I was here” and ran off with his $250.

The officers then informed the surprised tourists that they were victims of a scam.

“Gore does this all the time” said one cop.  “Every year we get closer to catching him.”

The NYPD has issued an all points bulletin for the capture of Al Gore.  No word on whether the tourists would be able to get their money back.

“America sucks” said one.  “Bad man take my money!”

New Yorkers are advised that if they spot Gore to remain calm and contact their local precinct.


4 Responses

  1. The Jungers says:

    Stupid tourists, didn’t they ever see an inconvenient truth? That was the biggest scam of them all!

  2. Karen Howes says:

    Crap, he’s probably going to make a new documentary now… “An Inconvenient Scam”

  3. Al Gore was later heard screaming “EXCELSIOR!” as he used his ill-gotten money to get a massage with a second chakra happy ending.

  4. Matt says:

    Gotta give it to the Goracle, he did better at this than he did selling that snake oil he was peddling for all these years.

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