Secretary of State John Kerry, an avid bicyclist, broke his leg in France after the bike he was riding was attacked by an assault curb. “The bike that Secretary Kerry was peacefully riding was attacked by a curb” said a State department spokesperson. The Secretary broke his right femur. The Secretary is stable and never […]

Dateline September 16th, 1787. Ye Olde New York Times We here at Ye Olde New York Times have just finished reading the plan of the Philadelphia convention for the proposed so-called “Constitution of the United States” and find it lacking in many respects. Indeed the preamble to the so-called Constitution serves as a warning to […]

Being a well-established, well-known, well-paid blogger has its perks.  Or so I’ve been told.  I am none of those.  But I was lucky enough to snag an interview with Republican presidential candidate Ted Cruz. Like many in the media I was confused by the fact that Cruz, who claims to be Hispanic, could also be […]

Warren Wilhelm Jr, former mayor of New York City and The 45th President of the United States announced today that he will be moving the Capitol to Nicaragua. “Washington D.C. is hopelessly white.” And with the white race comes corruption and greed, envy and racism, intolerance and extremism in the name of the white man’s […]

With the 2016 Presidential campaign in full swing attention has focused on the announced and yet-to-be-announced candidates.  Many have written me to ask who I would support. After giving it careful thought and investigating where the candidates stand on today’s hot-button issues I have decided that there is only one person for the job:  former […]

To the citizens of Baltimore: Greetings and salutations. Like many citizens of Detroit I have watched the rioting in Baltimore with one thought on my mind:  “Well thank God Detroit is no longer alone.” I am filled with joy at knowing that at last Detroit has a sister city.  I want to assure all the […]

One of the things I like to do here at the Worldwide Headquarters of Manhattan Infidel™ is freebase speculate on what might have happened if history had been different.  And so I take my readers to December 8th, 1941.  America had been attacked the day before by Japan.  President Stephanie Rawlings Blake addresses congress and […]

In 2067 the Department of Thought will celebrate 50 years.  We here at the Worldwide Headquarters of Manhattan Infidel™ would like to use the pages of this humble blog to celebrate some of the more notable highlights of this venerated Federal department. March 30, 2017: The Department of Thought becomes law With overwhelming bipartisan support […]

A massive march in Paris to show solidarity against an act of terror.  The 70th anniversary of the liberation of Auschwitz.  What do these two events have in common? Leaders from around the world attended.  But our President did not. With this in mind I now present the “Will President Obama Attend This Event Template™.” […]

Monday as New York City braced itself for a potential blizzard King Andrew Cuomo of New York and Lord Mayor Warren Wilhelm Jr. made a controversial decision:  Subways, the lifeline of the city, will be shut down. As the world now knows the so-called “Blizzard of 2015” was a bust, leaving only six inches of snow […]