Ricochet Rabbit Accused of Bias Against Minorities!

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Controversial law and order sheriff Ricochet Rabbit of the town of Hoop ‘n’ Holler has been accused of using his office improperly and showing a clear pattern of bias against peoples of color.

“The other day I was leaving my office and Ricochet approached me” said the head of the town’s chapter of the NAACP.

He asked me where I was going. I said I was going to find a white woman to make love to. Perhaps I shouldn’t have said that. Ricochet is trouble and I’m something of a wise ass. Anyway he looked at me and said “Boy, we don’t want no trouble now do we?” That’s when I told him to stop disrespecting my kind. You know what he did? He used his gun with one of his trick bullets. I thought I was going to be shot instead the bullet turned into a large mallet and hit me over the head. Part of me would  have preferred to be shot. The mallet thing just shows a complete lack of respect.

On another occasion Ricochet interrupted a fight between two men in the Dominican part of town and used his special gun to draw targets on both their noses and punch them.

“This white rabbit don’t respect us at all” said one of the men.

And with all the money I’m making selling drugs in this town he had better respect me. No one draws a target on my nose unless it’s my plastic surgeon. Or one of my gang members for some sort of initiation. But no white rabbit. I’m tired of the white rabbits always keeping me down. Just the other day I went chasing a white rabbit and I knew I was going to fall. So I told everybody a hookah smoking caterpillar had given me the call. But I digress.

Elected on a law and order platform and promising to make Hoop ‘n’ Holler “Safer than Oswego, New York on a Monday night” Ricochet initially proved popular with residents as violent crime dropped.

Employing the “broken window” philosophy of policing popularized by Rudy Giuliani  Ricochet would target citizens for minor offenses.

“Our homeowners association has strict rules about mailboxes” said one homeowner.

My mailbox was not regulation height. It was five inches too high. Ricochet shot me 57 times with his mallet pistol thing. I bought a regulation height mailbox the next day. Fear is a very powerful motivator. Still, I bet the homes owned by white people would not have been targeted like this.

Ricochet denies any bias against minorities and says he is not targeting them because of their color.

“I’m a sheriff. I uphold the law” said Rabbit.

Sure I profile minorities but you know what? It works. They are more likely to committing a crime than white people. I’m not going to apologize for that. I’ve made this town safer. Safer than Fulton, New York on a Tuesday night.

Despite Ricochet’s denials the State is looking into having him removed. Rabbit has said that if removed he’ll run higher office.

“They think they have it bad now just wait until I become Governor Rabbit.”

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4 Responses

  1. LSP says:

    White… Rabbit… damn you, Infidel! Grace Slick’s just arrived, thanks a lot.

  2. Manhattan Infidel says:

    One pill makes you larger

    One pill makes you small

    And the one that mother gives you don’t do anything at all.

  3. LSP says:

    Well it was all fun and games until you woke up and… hippies had ripped off your sailboat.

    Thanks a lot, “Steve” Stills.

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