Can You Pass Fourth Grade Math?

The isosceles triangle self-identifies as transgender.

The isosceles triangle self-identifies as transgender.

Here at the Worldwide Headquarters of Manhattan Infidel™ we do more than expose the news stories the MSM won’t print.  We care about our readers and want them to be better, more informed citizens. Better, more informed citizens who can afford good lawyers when they are discovered in a cheap motel room with a Dominican hooker and five grams of coke.

So with this principle in mind I now present a Math test.  Hopefully this test will enlighten you as much as it did me.

227 + 14 equals

  1. 241
  2. Math was invented by the white man.  As such it is racist
  3. I can’t believe you’d even ask such a question when there is so much suffering in the world
  4. I want to be a woman

A deli is now serving number 339.  Who will be served next?

  1. 340
  2. Who will be served next?  Social justice!
  3. Who cares?  I deserve to be served next!
  4. Waiting in line makes me feel nonempowered and victimized!

A bus has 14 rows with four passenger seats in each row. What is the total number of passenger seats on the bus?

  1. 56.
  2. As long as this bus is heading to a #blacklivesmatter rally who cares?
  3. I will gladly give up my seat to the transgender activist
  4. How many of these so-called seats self-identify as recliners?

Kim is thinking of a number greater than 17.  Her number is an odd number. What could be her number?

  1. 25
  2. Isn’t that just like the white man?  Distracting woman with problems like these so they won’t focus on their oppression
  3. Why is this number odd? That is a moral judgment that shames this test
  4. Does Kim have a penis?  Did she used to have one?  Is she biologically “female”? What is her self-identity?

Chad’s brother is playing with 43 toy blocks. Which value is the same as 43?

  1. Four tens and three ones
  2. I salute Chad’s brother for playing with toy blocks instead of surrendering to a testosterone-fueled rage and playing football
  3. Wouldn’t Chad’s brother rather play with Barbie dolls?
  4. Has Chad started his hormone therapy yet?

Yolanda buys a video game and gets 46 cents in change. How many quarters, dimes, nickels and pennies add up to 46?

  1. This question is irrelevant. Yolanda should be marching in the streets instead of buying video games!
  2. This question is irrelevant. Once Bernie Sanders establishes a socialist workers’ paradise everything will be free!
  3. This question is irrelevant.  Yolanda sneers at your white privilege!
  4. This question is irrelevant.  Yolanda has a penis!

There are nine people fishing in a lake.  Each person caught six fish. What was the total number of fish caught?

  1. Was this a protected wetland?  I hope the EPA arrests them!
  2. Each person caught the same number of fish. Coincidence or the glory of socialism?
  3. Once the class struggle is eliminated fish will coexist peacefully with peoplekind.
  4. How many of the fish self-identified as transgender?

Hannah owns four pair of pants. One of them is gray.  Which percentage of her pants are gray?

  1. First off I salute Hannah for not wearing a dress. That’s what society wants!
  2. What age did Hannah start wearing pants?  Was this before she started to self-identify as a man?
  3. Does Hannah dress as a man when she goes out on dates with women?
  4. Is Hannah pre-op or post-op?

Soccer practice starts at 4:15 and ends at 5:30.  How long is practice?

  1. Europeans love soccer. This means it is a more intelligent sport than football
  2. Europeans love socialism.  This means that the soccer team doesn’t keep score
  3. Unlike America, Europeans love and welcome Muslims.  The soccer team takes time out from practice to face Mecca and kneel on their prayer rugs. Even the non-Muslims
  4. Practice had to end early so the players could take estrogen and put on dresses.

There you have it readers. I hope everyone passed.  Your self-identity depends on it.


4 Responses

  1. Petermc3 says:

    My uber-rich friend Mike is taking me to the Yankee game tonight: 3 seats@ $1250 p/seat in the Legends suite. How much money is Mike wasting?

Leave a Reply

Using Gravatars in the comments - get your own and be recognized!

XHTML: These are some of the tags you can use: <a href=""> <b> <blockquote> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>