In the week since “Debate-Apocalypse” in the Mile High City, many in the mainstream media have sought to explain President Obama’s performance with code words.  And in the tradition of the mainstream media (which exists in order to promote the Democratic Party dissemination of information) I will now enter the fray and give a sampling from the new Manhattan Infidel Obama dictionary.

One of the most frequent excuses the mainstream media has made for President Obama’s less than stellar performance at the first debate was that he was too “professorial.”   Now with my handy Manhattan Infidel dictionary by my side I have looked up the meaning of professorial.

Professorial.  [adjective. From the old English meaning “to have one’s head up one’s ass.”  See “Unprepared.” “Lazy.”  “Incompetent.” “Out of one’s league.” “Blown away by the competition but not to worry, the MSM will hold your water.”]

And from this definition one can clearly see that President Obama was indeed too “professorial” to win last week’s debate.

To use this in a sentence I believe this example suffices:

President Obama was too professorial at the debate.  Much like the Boston Red Sox were too professorial to win more than 69 games this year.

Or

President Obama is too professorial to defend American interests.

Or to use another example

President Obama is too professorial to garnish his dog.  He eats it raw.

Or

FDR was too professorial to end the depression or even come up with an economic plan to not make it worse.

Or perhaps

The Titanic was too professorial to avoid the iceberg.

Or perhaps this very telling example of “professorialism.”

Pete Best was too professorial to drum for the Beatles.

Again, using the definition of “professorial” in its correct context, let us imagine for a second the following conversation between two men:

First man:  How was your date last night?

Second man:  She was too professorial.

Now if we go behind the words used in the aforementioned dialogue what we see is a shining example of professorialism.  The first man is inquiring if the date was fun.  Was she engaging?  Was she witty?  Did the conversation over dinner hold interest?

The response from the second man, that she was “professorial” could only mean that she was as intelligent as Jessica Simpson, as talented as Simpson’s brunette sister, you know, the one who danced a jig on Saturday Night live when the wrong tape-recorded song started playing, and as feminine and agreeable as Rosie O’Donnell after a full week of not bathing and eating only dairy products.  In short, a cluster fuck of “Professorialism.”

Another way the mainstream media has used the concept of “professorialism” in last week’s debate is to describe President Obama as “over-prepared.”

Now let’s look at the dictionary, shall we?

Over-prepared. [Latin.  Meaning, “Doesn’t know jack shit.”  See Professorial.]

I shall now provide an example of “Over-prepared.”

First man:  How did the job interview go?

Second man:  Dude, I think I was over-prepared.

Now the second man, by admitting that he went into the job interview “over-prepared”  is in fact admitting to

• Lying on his resume
• Being under-qualified;
• Having no real accomplishments to speak of
• Never having had a read  job; and
• Staring at the floor and not answering the interviewer’s questions

I hope, dear readers, that my explanation of “professorialism” will help you make sense of the election campaign as it enters its final month.

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