Sony Pictures announced today that it has green lighted and is rushing into production a biopic of President Barack Obama that is scheduled to be released by the end of next Summer.
The movie, tentatively entitled “The Greatest Socialist Story Ever Told” will show Obama’s rise to the Presidency and the opposition he meets from sinners. Said an executive at Sony:
Hollywood has a long history of exciting story telling. And the story of his holiness President Obama is a great story. Born in a manger. A mysterious past. I mean no one knows about his hidden life before his public ministry. His message of hope and forgiveness for those who pay their fair share of taxes. I could go on forever but my cocaine has arrived.
Of course the big question would be: “Who would play the man who restored hope to the world?”
Naturally every black actor in Hollywood wanted the part.
We auditioned hundreds of young black actors but unfortunately none had the requisite manliness to portray Obama. So we had to settle for Will Smith.
Filming has already begun. Two scenes have been leaked to the press which show that the biopic of the great leader is a straight-forward, fact-based movie of this remarkable man.
In the first scene, dubbed “The Sermon on Michigan Avenue“, Obama gathers his disciples:
Barack Obama: Blessed are the poor. For the income of millionaires and billionaires will be redistributed to you. Rejoice, and be exceeding glad; for your reward is great in Washington D.C., and behold, the Democratic Party will not abandon you, until the consummation of the Republican Party.
Bill Ayers: Can I make bombs to blow up policemen and military personnel?
Barack Obama: He who lives by the sword dies by the sword.
Bill Ayers: But I’m not using a sword. I’m using bombs.
Barack Obama: Present.
In the second scene an anguished President Obama deals with Republican opposition:
Mitch McConnell: Mr. President. We are not going to raise taxes.
Barack Obama: O faithless and perverse generation! How long shall I be with you? How long shall I put up with you?
Harry Reid: Truly this man was the son of God!
It is hoped that the release of the movie will stop Hollywood’s long slump at the box office.
“We want everyone to see this movie” said a Hollywood insider. “Well, except for Republicans. We don’t want stupid people seeing the movie. That’s not the crowd we want. And that’s why Hollywood is America!”
(361)
‘Present’
Hahahaaa
Blessed are the bomb makers, for their’s is the kingdom of boom!