Suspicious Packages Mailed to CNN, Obama and Clintons; Serfs Advised to be More Respectful to Their Masters

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Serfs obey your masters!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wednesday was a day of terror throughout the United States, possibly more damaging than 9/11, after a series of suspicious packages were mailed to America’s elite.

David Gregory, a member of the ruling class of America, spoke for all when he said:

Political violence against the ruling class is never acceptable. We may have political differences but I’m sure we can all agree that agreeing with CNN is agreeable. And you want to be agreeable don’t you?  You don’t want any bombs mailed to you, do you? Shame if we were to shoot up another Republican soft ball practice. That’s not political violence. That is the rising up of a quite angry electorate against the beasts in Republican clothing. Don’t believe me? Look at my hair. 

My hair has spoken

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I have elite hair. And that means I am to be believed.  I’m just glad the hate-filled deplorable Trump supporter who sent the bomb was unsuccessful. Now I can continue to berate the serfs with my superior knowledge and hair.

In New York City, where the act of disrespect to America’s masters was located, Mayor Warren Wilhelm Jr. (stage name Bill de Blasio) lamented the political divisions in America and called for increased tolerance of mainstream Democratic opinion.

This is clearly an act of terror and an attempt to silence correct political thought such as that expressed on CNN. New York will not tolerate this. I have ordered the rounding up of all those who did not vote for me as potential co-conspirators. Democrats will not be cowed. We may have political differences but as long as Republicans realize their moral and intellectual inferiority and the necessity to do our bidding all will be well.

A suspicious package was also sent to billionaire philanthropist Nazi collaborator George Soros.  Fortunately the billionaire philanthropist Nazi collaborator and person who is funding the central American caravan was not at home, saving another well-known Democrat Nazi from Republican violence.

“It was probably mailed by Jews” said a Soros employee nazi collaborator.

From the White House Donald Trump, the evil orange figure out to destroy America constitutionally elected President denounced the mailing of the packages.

“I strongly condemn today’s events” said literally Hitler.

Ah, but what do you expect the destroyer of universes to say? This man, who is literally Hitler and yes I know I already said that but it bears repeating, will say anything to hide his lust for power and violence.

As of press time the perpetrator or perpetrators of today’s act of anti-elite violence has not been caught but according to an FBI profiler the suspect is a white male, 45-60 years old, a Republican, probably Catholic and a gun owner who hates brown people. He might also be a smoker (and not a vaper as those who vape are usually progressives who live in urban areas and are peoples of color.)

CNN has offered a reward to the first person who shoots a Trump supporter.

“Violence against deplorables is not violence but righteousness” said CNN President Jeff Zucker.

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2 Comments

2 Responses

  1. LSP says:

    I detect thoughtcrime, Infidel.

    There’s a place for that.

    Report yourself, immediately.

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