Betty Boop: Casey Affleck Sexually Harassed Me!

This girl just wants to be loved by you – but it’s my choice!











Notorious bad girl sex symbol Betty Boop has unleashed explosive allegations against actor and director Casey Affleck.

“While working on a film with him I was subject to repeated harassment and innuendos” said the curvy brunette.

He kept leering at me. Granted I am very sexy but I am also a professional and I didn’t appreciate it. Not only would he leer at me but he would pretend to trip and grab my breasts to stop his fall. Come on. I wasn’t born yesterday. That trick is as old as the “I’m sorry I walked out of the bathroom naked I didn’t know you were in the next room” trick that Justin Bieber used to pull on me. Granted Bieber is Canadian and every woman wants a Canadian. They are so sexy. But I’m not that kind of girl. Except for Canadians. And Ben Affleck. You know when I took this job I thought Casey would introduce me to his brother. I wouldn’t mind being sexually harassed by Ben Affleck. He’s so sexy. Granted he’s not Justin Bieber. Or even Canadian. And I suspect he wears a toupee. That’s a turnoff. So yeah. Sexual harassment is always bad. Unless it’s by Justin Bieber, or any Canadian. Or even Ben Affleck who may be sporting a wig. Harassment! It goes against human dignity! Unless it’s a Canadian harassing you. But in the absence of Canadians I’ll take an Irishman. They are sexy. Unless they are from Ulster. But that’s just common sense.

Casey Affleck for his part denies Ms. Boop’s allegations.

“Come on. I”m a busy actor and director. I don’t have time to harass anyone” said the not as sexy brother of Ben Affleck.

And I’m a liberal Democrat. And we don’t harass women. This is just one big misunderstanding. As for falling on her and grabbing her breasts I have high blood pressure and the medication the doctor has me on lowers it. A lot. Sometimes I get dizzy when I stand up. That’s what happened. I got dizzy and fell forward. I needed something to grab onto so I wouldn’t hit the floor and the only thing available were Ms. Boop’s boobs. I mean come on. You can see those babies from space. I’m just glad her life-saving breasts were there for me to grab hold of. Granted I got dizzy 17 times that day around her and every time I did I fell into her breasts. But that’s just a coincidence. I’m an actor and a director. You can trust me.


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Actor and director Ben Affleck, who is sexier than his brother Casey Affleck though not as sexy as a Canadian, denies wearing a toupee.

“That’s my real hair” he said.

“Granted it is helmet-like but I think it makes me look sexy. Sexier than an Irishman. You know a real one not one of those fake ones from Ulster. But that’s just common sense.”


2 Responses

  1. LSP says:

    Thanks for reminding me of that heaven on earth we call “Ulster.”

    I, for one, hope that Ms. Boop wins her lawsuit.

    • Manhattan Infidel says:

      One of the people I work with is from Ulster. I asked him if it’s true that Ulster is a land of bandits and brawlers. He said yes then took my wallet and beat me up.

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