Spam! (The Climate-Controlled Edition)

Spam I am.

Spam I am.

Due to contractual obligations I must empty my spam folder at least once a month (just like my bowels).  And so for your edification and blogging pleasure I now present the latest visit to the Spam factory.

Spam factory is an equal opportunity employer and does not discriminate on the basis of race, religion or sexual preference.  Except the Irish.  They can go to hell.

 Ugg Outlet Store writes:

I’ve tried happy hour in the past.

It’s where I pick up most of my transients.

Ubikukuk writes:

One must accommodate busy mothers.

That’s why I now offer 15 minute “comfort” sessions instead of the usual hour.

Darereceber writes:

Your renal system generates suitable ranges.

You bet your ass it does.  And what’s more my renal system is free-range!

Oakley Oil Rig  writes:

You are my intake!

You had me at intake you big lug!

River Run Resort writes:

 We are here for a bachelorette party.

Okay, I’ll jump out of the cake but I have to be home by midnight.

Ray Ban Junior Hamburg writes:

Your weblog has ton readers.

My readers are not fat!  They have glandular issues.

Iat Org Uk writes:

The cow of the people.

I like to think of myself as the people’s cow.

Sports Podiatry writes:

Don’t be afraid to yield control.

But it’s my turn to be the dom!

Radise Net writes:

Have you ever know a lady who did not carry a handbag?

Yes.  I call these women “the ladies who handbags I have recently stolen.”

Nhuntsoftware writes:

And the black connection is attached to the negative side.

That’s connection of color you racist.

Asopenrs writes:

But why have these Long Island geese been so numerous and persistent the last fourteen days?

It’s called the Long Island geese apocalypse.  People laughed at me when I said it was coming. Who’s laughing now?

Grand Canyon Inn writes:

And the neck muscles should be relaxed.

I’m trying.  This has never happened before. I’m so embarrassed.

And finally, Hufenguang writes:

They are still well preserved and creepy as ever.

Thank you.  My secret?  Formaldehyde and a climate-controlled crawlspace.

And there you have it.  Keep those cards and letters coming.  (Unless you’re Irish that is.)

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6 Responses

  1. GOODSTUFF says:

    SPAM the other Mystery Meat

    “Why hide in the shadows when you can shine” – GOODSTUFF

    http://goodstuffsworld.blogspot.com/2014/12/spam-other-mystery-meat.html

  2. Petermc3 says:

    What body part do liverwurst from China be coming from?

  3. Listerine works as well as formaldehyde and draws less attention from the Irish cops.

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